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Flux by kethlenda [Reviews - 2]
I. St. Mungo's "Please, do come in," said the mediwizard, gesturing the couple into his office with a wave of his clipboard. "Mrs. Lupin, is it not?" "Yes," she said. Remus jabbed her playfully in the ribs with his elbow. "How many times did I tell you I wouldn't mind if you kept your maiden name?" She laughed. "I might as well have. Everybody still calls me Tonks anyway. Everybody except you." She elbowed him back. It was true--her friends had taken to calling her Tonks Lupin, which should have sounded awkward, but somehow suited her just fine. Her mood was dampened considerably by the mediwizard's office. It was white and pristine and sparsely furnished. There was a smell of mint, and beneath that a suggestion of less-pleasant herbs and potions. There was just something discomfiting, at least to Tonks, about a room this immaculate. And the reason she was here wasn't doing much to put her at ease, either. "Please sit down," said the mediwizard kindly, indicating a chair. Tonks sat. Remus remained standing, his hand on her shoulder. So overprotective, she thought with bemused affection. Does he think I'm going to break? But deep down, she had to admit she was worried too. "You're here for a pregnancy test?" Tonks nodded. The mediwizard took his wand from behind his ear. "What are you going to do?" asked Remus, his grip on Tonks's shoulder tightening. "This charm will not harm the fetus, if your wife is in fact pregnant. It will merely allow us to have a look, if you will." He pointed the wand at Tonks's abdomen, concentrated for a moment, and spoke an incantation. A glowing bubble appeared in the air in front of her belly. "Oh, look!" she said. Inside the orb, wiggling and kicking, was their baby. So...tiny. "Congratulations, Mrs. Lupin," said the mediwizard. "You are approximately two months pregnant, and it seems you are carrying a healthy little girl." Remus was still clutching her shoulder so hard it almost hurt. "There's one more thing," he said, and Tonks could hear an odd catch in his voice. "I'm...I'm a werewolf. And I don't know if the...curse...is hereditary." "Oh, dear me," said the mediwizard. He was silent for a few long seconds. He took a deep breath and let it out. He looked away from Remus as though the werewolf's pained gaze would burn him; instead he met Tonks's eyes, and took her hand in an avuncular way. "It is difficult to say," he said when he finally spoke. "You see, there have not been many...opportunities to study the matter. Werewolves usually mate among their own kind. And in all my years, I've never met a woman who was pregnant by a werewolf and...and, well, chose to keep it." "I won't have her in danger," said Remus. "I don't want her to keep it if the pregnancy will harm her." Tonks was tempted to tell him to shut up, to let her make her own choice, to stop being such a knight in shining armor, but the whole situation was overwhelming. She didn't know anymore what she wanted to do, and suddenly she wanted nothing more than to curl up alone in her own bed and think in peace. The mediwizard sighed. "I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news. Mrs. Lupin, would you be able to come back for a checkup at the full moon? We may be able to find something out then." II. Hogsmeade Remus and Tonks returned to Hogsmeade. They had been living there since their wedding; it was convenient for both of them. Tonks was still on assignment at Hogwarts, though she privately doubted the Death Eaters would attack the school again, not with so few professors and students left to terrorize. And Remus was able to sneak into the Shrieking Shack again to transform in private. While he was less than enamored of the old place and all its memories, he needed somewhere to stay during the full moon now that Snape was in hiding with Voldemort and could no longer brew Wolfsbane for him. Two weeks until the full moon; two of the longest weeks in Tonks's life. She lay awake night after night, wandering through a maze of thoughts. She wondered if Remus was as worried as she was; she didn't dare talk to him about her fears. She was afraid he would think she was ashamed of his condition. It's not that. It's just--would it be right to bring a werewolf into the world? Remus was so young when he was bitten, and I know how much trouble he had coming to terms with it. And this baby might be cursed from birth. How could I give birth to a child knowing she would go through the kind of pain Remus has gone through? She eyed his scars, shuddering at the mental image of such scars on a child's skin. He got some of those when he was little, too... But couldn't we--if we gave the baby a loving home, couldn't we help her deal with the curse? Sure. And then how would we explain to her why she has to hide her nature and live a lie, just to go to school, just to get a job? But she's mine and his...and he'd make such a good father... Go to sleep, Tonks. There's no point in worrying about this until after you've seen the mediwizard again. III. St. Mungo's For the hundredth time, Tonks wished Remus could have come with her to the hospital. She felt like her legs were turning to jelly. She drank a glass of water as she waited outside the mediwizard's office and realized, at the sight of the water swirling and sloshing madly in the glass, that she was trembling. She knew, of course, that he could not come with her; he was holing up in the Shack, preparing for his transformation. She missed him; oh, how she missed him. Even his overprotective hand on her shoulder would feel like an anchor tonight. "Mrs. Lupin," said the mediwizard, emerging from his office. "Come on in." She swallowed and entered the office. She sat down in the chair and tried to rest her hands calmly in her lap. Instead she found herself wringing them almost painfully. The mediwizard was making small talk; it seemed to her as though he were speaking from a great distance. She nodded politely and wished he would get on with it. She glanced toward the window, saw that the sky was darkening. A full moon always rose just after sunset. Soon she would know. Finally the mediwizard stopped talking and drew his wand. The incantation again, and then the strange little glowing bubble that allowed her to see inside her own womb. Inside the bubble, the baby writhed. And then there was a lightening of the sky through the window--moonrise--and a wave of excruciating pain racked Tonks's body. She cried out, doubled over. It was an effort to raise her head from between her knees and look back at the shimmering globe, but she did, and saw the baby, her baby, changing before her eyes. "No!" she shouted as she saw a lengthening of the child's nose--oh God, is that a tail? The mediwizard was trying to comfort her, trying to talk her through the spasm of pain. She could hear his voice but couldn't make out the words. The pain began to recede, and thought began to return. The choice before her was unimaginable. She wanted this baby, but how could she doom an innocent child to such suffering? "What would you want?" she whispered to the tiny daughter inside her. "What should I do?" She felt a strange stirring within her womb, not pain like that of a moment ago, but just a motion. Questioning, she looked back at the magical bubble, and saw that the fetus had returned to human form. And turned a violent shade of lime green. The mediwizard removed his glasses, wiped them on his coat, put them back on. "How...How did...I've never seen..." Still feeling as though she might faint any moment, Tonks smiled weakly. "I'm a Metamorphmagus. Looks like she got a bit of my talent." "It's too soon to say for sure," said the mediwizard cautiously. "But I do believe this baby may, just may, be able to switch between wolf and human form at will." Tears of relief began to fill Tonks's eyes. She knew there was more trouble ahead--for one, Remus would have a fit if he found out that the pregnancy would be very painful once a month, and she didn't know for sure that the mediwizard's theory was correct. But it was enough for now; she knew now that she wanted to give this baby a chance. "You've got all sorts of surprises for me, don't you?" she whispered. And privately, she whispered a name. Mira. |
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