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Maybe Next Time by kethlenda [Reviews - 2]
You'll be Henry the Eighth Wake up tomorrow, Alexander the Great Open your eyes in a new life again Oh maybe next time you'll be given a chance" --Paula Cole, "hush hush hush" They wonder why he loves her. There are mornings he wakes and feels fifteen years old again. Eyes still closed, he feels his heart race as he imagines what the day will hold. He will throw aside the red velvet curtain with its lavish gold tassels, yes, and his friends will be there—James already awake and raring to make an adventure of an ordinary morning, Sirius with his eyes half-open muttering about the sheer indecency of being awakened at the crack of nine, Peter joining James in teasing Sirius because that’s what Peter does, he follows— But when Remus opens his eyes, he sees bare walls and crumbling plaster. The quilt is threadbare. His body aches in places it never did when he was fifteen; he is marked with scars and he knows without looking that he is, inexorably, graying. And he knows what he will see if he closes his eyes again: James lying cold on the floor at Godric’s Hollow, green eyes staring endlessly at nothing. Peter slipping from his grasp, scurrying to keep his diabolical promise to the Dark Lord. Sirius—Sirius lost once to Azkaban, all those wasted years when Remus believed him guilty of the cruelest of treasons, and then lost again just when he’d been given a second chance to live… So young, all of them; two dead, one changed beyond recognition, all of their lives cut so short. Remus never thought that he, weak and tainted as he was, would be the one to survive. It seems wrong, and yet he knows that he too has lost his youth to the darkness of war and death and implacable time. But instead of closing his eyes again and surrendering to the nightmare that his life has been, he turns to see her lithe young limbs sprawled across the bed, and the rising sun bathing her sleeping face in red and gold. |
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